Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Nobody Could Have Predicted

Condoleeza Rice, the queen of smug, is in so many ways the overrated quintessence of that go-along-to-get-along Satanic banality which so typifies our benighted age: she lent her vestigial blackness as a fig-leaf to the Bushies' Jim Crow claim to the throne, and of course also as fig leaf to the ill-concealed fundamental misogyny of the GOP. As figurehead/fig-leaf she was perhaps the most useless National Security Advisor of all time, ignoring all sorts of explicit warnings, blaring klaxons and strobing idiot-lights to make the 9/11 plot the Most Successful Terror Attack Ever, and then somehow retaining her job. Then she was a key mouthpiece selling the wholly phony causus belli of the Iraq war, after which she signed off on the many war crimes the administration committed in torture chambers around the world.

In a truly just world Condescenda Rice would be in prison, on trial for her life, if not already divvied up for her organs. And in the real world of not too long ago she'd have been shunned by anybody self-respecting. But in the 21st Century, an age without shame or honor, she's still a Princess of the Classical Piano, soon to be trotted out for ratings by those heroes of the Left, Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin, to guest star on 30 Rock.

Part of me wants to say, leave it at: "Fuck you Tina Fey. Fuck you Alec Baldwin. Any time I'm ever tempted to listen to anything you have to say, I'll remember this, and flip the channel."

But perhaps it might be more creative and more positive all round to write some barbed jokes for use on the Condi episode. Maybe Tracy Morgan could man up and zing her like he did Sarah Palin. On maybe his character would have some pointed questions about how she came to join a a Willy-Hortonizing, KKK-Lite political organization that takes its life force from bigotries of all sorts, but most especially American whites' hatred of blacks. On maybe Tina Fey could, in a pop cultural reference, wonder if Condi and Laura were secretly "sister wives"?

Put 'em in the comments or better yet, send them to NBC!


Post a Comment

<< Home